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Joke of the Day
"What do you feed a feminist at a cookout? Trick question. Nobody invites feminists to a cookout."
Next Joke
"You remind me of a beautiful star in the night sky... You each have your own gravitational pull."
"""Java is to Javascript as ham is to hamster."""
"I'm opening a funeral home that has a bar in it. I know right?"
"How'd the hipster burn his tongue? He drank coffee before it was cool."
"A mama's boy is frantically running out of a strip club yelling... MY MOMMA TOLD ME IF I EVER CAME INTO A PLACE LIKE THIS I'D TURN INTO STONE. AND I FEEL IT'S STARTING"
"CORDUROY PILLOWS Making headlines"
"[hospital] Looks like ur Vine went viral. ""Yay!"" Sorry ur VEIN went viral...you have a fatal blood disease. ""So waitmy Vine didn't go viral?"""
"I dream of the day when automatic paper towel dispensers finally realize the human hand isn't 3 inches long."
"I never really liked Robin Williams movies. They may be funny, but they keep hanging around.^I'll^see^myself^out..."