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Joke of the Day

"I can love my son and refuse to support his lifestyle... I raised him better than to game on a console."

"Where do poor noodles live? In the spaghetto"

"If I own a gym my employees will be required to intermittently pester you. If you don't like it don't come to Jehovah's Fitness."

"Schrodinger: How's my cat, Doc? Vet: I have good news and bad news.."

"Yo mama so fat.. I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing."

"I was an atheist Until I found out I was a sex god."

"My nephew had his first day of kindergarten yesterday. I told him he gets to go back tomorrow. He said No thank you. I won't be going back."

"In the latest federal North Korean election, Kim Jung Un won 100% of the vote. A landslide victory against his sole competitor: ""*Or else*""."

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes."