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Joke of the Day

"What's a rapists favorite meal? Spaghetti-No's I'm sorry."

"How do you know when it's okay to swim in a pool of milk? When it's past your eyes."

"I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea."

"Teenager: Bae swag YOLO Me: In better times, people who spoke gibberish like that were burned as witches."

"What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison.... Let the down-votes ensue :)"

"There's this guy at work who's giving his wife a gym membership & a vegetable juicer for her birthday tomorrow. His name was Tom."

"What do you do with an elephant with 3 balls? Walk him and pitch to the rhino."

"What do you call a bird born in the 90s? A millennial falcon."

"How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart? You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!"

"I think it's bullcrap how Miley Cyrus can get naked, lick a sledge hammer, and people call it ""art"" and ""music"". Yet when I do it, I'm ""wasted"" and "" have to leave Home Depot""."