190615

Joke of the Day

"Silence is golden. Unless they're in the shower and you can't find their phone. In that case, silence is very very suspicious!"

Next Joke
 
"I'll never understand dentists. They stab you with little metal hooks and then tell you ""Your gums wouldn't bleed if you flossed more""."
"Hey, Dyson vacuum guy. You invented a previously existing invention. Relax."
"I can't find my Camel, it's gone! It's camelflage was too good"
"What do you call someone who only speaks one language? American."
"Why did r/TwoXChromosomes flood? The dyke broke."
"You hear about the guy who lost his eyelid in an accident? They used his foreskin for a skin graft. He turned out just fine, but he was a little cock eyed."
"The next person to show me that dress... ...is gonna get a white and gold eye."
"Who brew in the jewish house down the street? Hebrew."
"He's hot, I swear! Hang on, let me find another photo..."