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Joke of the Day

"They told me to dress for the job I want, not for the job I have. They fired me the next day because I dressed for a blowjob. I'll show myself out..."

"I used to have a fear of speed bumps But I'm slowly getting over it"

"Donald Trump wants to ban pre-shredded cheese He wants to make America grate again!"

"It's two in the morning. Do you know where your blankets are?"

"New Game Here's a new game we can all play! You have to use a long mallet to hit frozen potato treats through hoops on a field. All while dressed as a frontiersman I call it Croquette Crockett Croquet"

"Angelina's Twins Photographed In Public For First Time"

"My mistress bought me a Neck Clampotron XXX 5 years ago, and I've never looked back since!"

"What do call you someone who feeds on comatose patients and pizza? A vegetarian."

"I signed up for some Meteorology courses. MET 104 Standing in Deep Water MET 105 Standing in Heavy Rain MET 106 Acting Amazed"

"I recently earned 5 times the money I earned before 5x0=0"