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Joke of the Day

"Some people dont appreciate a good joke. When I say knock knock, youre supposed to say ""who's there?"" not ""im taking a shit, who are you?!"""

"""Your former crush likes this thing"" ""Your former crush likes this thing"" ""Your former crush likes this thing"" -Facebook"

"How well did Jackson Pollock do in art class? He passed it with flying colors. /heyo"

"A group of dogs walk into a University. They approach the receptionist who says, ""Hi, can I help you?"" ""Yeah,"" one of the dogs reply, ""We wanna see our Masters."""

"My wife says she's leaving me because of my obsession with karaoke. I said ""Fine, go on now go, walk out the door, just turn around now, because your not welcome anymore...."""

"When I was little I told my mom, ""when I grow up I want to be a magician."" ... She said to me, ""you can't do both!"""

"I'm too fat to be a hipster. I'm thinking of becoming a Heapster instead."

"I hadn't seen it in a while, but at a concert last night I saw someone using a disposable camera... It gave me a flashback"

"Which is an Islamic trait? A.heading B.heading C.heading"

"Me:What'd u ask Santa for 6: a speed boat M: like a Lego boat? 6: no M: oh for the bath? 6: no M: the pool? 6: *doesnt break eye contact* no"