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Joke of the Day

"My son donates his hair to charity & people are all, ""Sweet."" I donate the people in my basement's & people are all, ""We have a warrant!"""

"I wonder, if I say ""Hi"" to everyone on here, how many ""Hi's"" I get back? So let me say Hi...."

"Why don't chicken coops have four doors? They would be chicken sedans"

"Did you hear about the weird music that plays at Mozarts grave.... Don't worry, He's decomposing."

"They say the camera adds ten pounds. I knew this all camera diet was bad for me. They're just so delicious."

"Two Problems with North Carolina: Too many racists, and too many GODDAMN ASIANS."

"There's a part of me that still loves you. I hit that part with a hammer. Stupid part."

"Why didn't the pirate chessplayer enjoy his crackers? Because they were stale, matey!"

"What is the difference between a gay man and a fridge?.... ...A fridge doesn't fart when you pull your meat out."

"The iPhone doesn't have a headphone jack and the Samsung battery is exploding... It's like the mobile equivalent of our presidential election!"