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Joke of the Day
"Cauliflower is just ghost broccoli."
Next Joke
"When I die, please scatter my ashes over my iPhone, computer and TV, because I want to be left to my own devices."
"My biggest fear is that someone will say ""Git-R-Dun"" while I'm holding my child. Because I will instinctively swing my baby at their face."
"[NSFW] What's the difference between a sex doll and a store mannequin? Persistence."
"What do you call a dinosaur you just insulted? T-REKT."
"""I wasn't that drunk..."" ""Dude, you were driving your truck around the Walmart parking lot trying to find your truck."""
"As an unemotional person, I never thought pieces of papers would make me cry until I started to pay my bills"
"How's a divorce like a hurricane... There's a bunch of sucking and blowing, but in the end she takes your house."
"How many stones does it take to kill 3 birds? one.. one stone."
"when i die i want my kids to carry my casket. So they can let me down one more time."