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Joke of the Day
"When's the best time to see an optometrist? When you can't."
Next Joke
"ONLY text me in an emergency. Like my car's shooting flames from the trunk, one of my exes dies eventfully, or if someone thinks I'm sexy."
"Man's just been jailed for stealing an advent Calender He got 24 days"
"Whats a retarded person's favorite season? Autismn"
"Have you heard about the pig who took up disco dancing? He liked to swing his weight around."
"*tries several times to connect to the internet using a dial-up modem* *reaches #1 on the dubstep charts*"
"What do you call a Cadillac with a staircase on the back? An escalador."
"Did you hear that Jesus starred in a porn? it was called ""the second cumming"""
"what travels around the world but stays in one corner? postage stamp"
"cops shutting down my giant SLIP N' SLIDE again because the traffic on the highway needs to get around us I guess"