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Joke of the Day
"If you are hotter than me, wouldn't that make me cooler than you."
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"One mans trash... ""One man's rubbish is another man's treasure"" is a fantastic Idiom. But it's a horrible way to tell your kid that he's adopted."
"What is Beethoven doing these days? Decomposing."
"What did Archimedes exclaim when he discovered his penis floated in water? URETHRA!"
"Famous Deaths happen in 3s... Sunday it was Mr Fuji, Yesterday it was Gene Wilder, Today it was the Minnesota Vikings season."
"Last night at an Indian diner the server walks up to me and asks ""Curry Ok Sir?"" I said ""Alright, just one song and then you can fuck off""."
"Lack creativity? Do you like doing the exact same thing every day all day? Open a barbershop in Asia."
"""should i go into the arts?"" ""can you imagine yourself doing anything else?"" ""no"" ""then i wouldn't go into the arts, with no imagination"""
"What does a rock do all day? Nothing. (this joke was made by daughter when she was 5)"
"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2 and I have no idea how they got in there!"