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Joke of the Day

"Back in my day, we didn't have Twitter, Facebook, or even the internet. Guys would have to walk uphill for days to tell me that I'm gay."

Next Joke
 
"What did the fisherman say to the magician? Pick a cod, any cod!"
"What did the drifter say to the person he hit ? RIP my E-brake"
"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Tentacles"
"My dad says that if I don't stop typing so loudly, he's gonna slam my face into the fidbdiUHy6hivIifHfGK"
"TIL several states in the South banned calculus from schools in the 1950's. Apparently they opposed integration."
"An eskimo pulls up to an intersection... with a flat tire. A Welsh guy pulls up next to him and says: ""Hey, I think you've blown a seal!"" To which the eskimo replies: ""So what? You shag sheep."""
"Hedgehogs would seem far less adorable if they had more relevant names like 'Stabbyrabbit' or 'Weaponrat'"
"Here, take my hand. Now slap yourself with it."
"I have accepted ""Jesus Christ!"" as my personal exclamation."