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Joke of the Day
"I can make you speak like an Indian. How? That's right!"
Next Joke
 
"I hated my job at medieval times because I always got stuck working on the knight shift"
"A relationship is like a fart If you have to force it, it's probably shit."
"There's three types of people in this world... ...those who are good at math, and those who aren't."
"When I don't approve of another shopper's groceries in the checkout line, I just use one of those separator bars to sweep them to the floor"
"Wanna talk about Sodium? Na Nitric Oxide? NO Oxygen Magnesium Phosphorus Iodine Sulfur or Fluorine? OMg PISS OFF ...Potassium? K"
"Today I fucked up... by being a power bottom"
"What happens when a T-rex gets strep? His throat becomes saurus."
"Coworker:I'll take care if it. *Translation* You're gonna take care of it. You just don't know it yet."
"The front desk lady at this remote motel is barely concealing her howling desire to graphically murder me. I'll be honest, it's refreshing."