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Joke of the Day

"How to keep a man happy: 1) Phone him 86 times a day 2) Wail hysterically 3) Be needy 4) Never sleep with him 5) Buy yourself shoes"

"Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life."

"I have decided to become a dolphin... It is my true porpoise in life"

"Tried to catch fog yesterday... Mist."

"Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? Because she wanted to rock and roll."

"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Its cheesy."

"I hate people who talk behind my back. They discussed me."

"You never know what you've got until... you clean your room."

"What is the smartest thing to come out of a woman's mouth? Einstein's cock."

"A magnet walks into a bar...., what does he order? Nothing... he's still stuck to the entrance."