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Joke of the Day

"i'm going to sell a drink called ""responsibly"" so after every liquor ad when they say ""drink responsibly"" hey free advertising boom i win"

Next Joke
 
"Been dating this new chick and some days i like her and some days i don't. so i made her a mixed signal tape"
"I can tell by the way you give me instructions that you've dealt with a lot of dumb people before me."
"I'm 87 but have the body of a 25-year-old supermodel But it takes up too much room in my freezer, any suggestions?"
"What's the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator? A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out of it."
"What kind of fence goes on strike? A picket fence."
"How do you know if a fortune-teller is shit? You knock on her door and she shouts ""Who is it?""."
"[interrogation] ""Where were you on the night of the 5th?"" ""Dealing drugs."" ""Louder for the tape?"" [leans in] ""Healing pugs. I'm a pug vet."""
"My favourite Vikings joke. Blair Walsh"
"Going to a Kenny G concert must feel like being on hold for two hours."