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Joke of the Day

"And after I smoked the medicinal marijuana, I ate three tubes of medicinal chocolate chip cookie dough."

"What kind of bees get you high? Doo-bees... I'm so sorry for that"

"Yo. Real shit. Just bcause you went and got your logo printed on some t-shirts, that does NOT mean you have a clothing company. U got shirts"

"Did you know humans are born with four kidneys? Two of them grow into adult knees."

"What do cannibals and politicians have in common? They both enjoy handshakes."

"What is Forest Gump's Email password? 1Forest1"

"When I was a younger man girls used to ""check me out"". Now women just ""keep an eye on me"""

"If PETA is upset about Lady Gaga's meat dress, wait until they hear about what people do to that stuff in restaurant kitchens."

"I asked God whether or not to open a brothel He replied ""build it and they will come""."

"[After reading vows] Me: Why are you upset? Her: Me: Was it the Donald- Her: Yes, it was the Donald Duck voice."