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Joke of the Day

"Why did the blind man become Hitler? Because he could **Nazi.** *(disclaimer may have to read aloud for joke to occur, if laughing occurs for more than 4 seconds please contact your doctor)*"

"I wonder what song The Little Mermaid was singing when she viciously ripped a clam in half to make that cute bikini top"

"You know what they said about the year old sheep that kept getting into trouble... ...he was a mutton for punishment."

"Someone just used the phrase, 'that's a big load', on this conference call, and suddenly I'm paying attention."

"What do you call someone who wears leather, likes bondage and likes getting inked? Moleskine"

"What do you call the cross between an elephant and a rhino? 'Ell if I know."

"A fun prank if your roommate is a cartoon character is to draw clothes on the mirror so he leaves the house not realizing he's naked."

"How do you turn your dishwasher into a snow plow? Give her a shovel"

"I explained how Pac-Man works to my kids, and apparently 4 ghosts constantly chasing someone is a terrifying story to 4yos."

"Why don't they have driving classes and sex Ed on the same day in Saudi Arabia? Because the camels can't handle it"