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Joke of the Day

"My mom doesn't understand that powdered donuts are eaten over cd cases while in cars, and my friends love donuts, and that's why. (Not blow)"

"An autistic and a vegan walk into a bar You only know because they mention it every other sentence"

"They're not all brilliant, but they're all mine. Meaning my tweets, and maybe my kids, whatever."

"""Be cool, it's the cops"" I said to my 3 cats I dressed up like robbers as my other 3 cats came out of the kitchen dressed like policemen"

"""The first guy to suggest peeing on a jellyfish sting was called a pervert but it worked"" I said to my wife as she complained of a toothache"

"What was the name of the most famous stripper in Ancient Greece? Socra-tease"

"You must be 1/x, Because you are the rate of change of my natural log."

"I told you to pick up a slow cooker... All I see when I look in the kitchen is a turtle wearing a chefs hat"

"Time is not wasted, when your wasted all the time"" ~Benjamin Franklin (I think.)"

"Multiple Choice Question Which of the following is a dangerous disease? A)Bola B)Bola C)Bola D)Bola E)Bola"