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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why did the wrestlers have to fight in the dark? A: Their match wouldn't light."

"Me: [uncontrollable sobbing] I can't see you anymore. I won't let you hurt me again. Trainer: It was a sit-up. You did 1 sit-up."

"The bible says ""Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you"" But I think that's sexual harassment."

"My math teacher used to call me average.... It was mean."

"My love for you is like diarrhea......I cant hold it in.."

"The Clippers are gonna be bought by the former CEO of Microsoft. Apparently he's looking for something to occupy himself while Windows is installing ""critical updates."""

"What is an autograph? A chart which shows car sales."

"Being Santa sounds easy... (NSFW) I've got plenty of experience emptying my sack into socks."

"Did you hear about those Indian heptuplets who became dangerous criminals? They were known as the Seven Deadly Singhs."

"Did you here they opened a pasta joint in hell? They call it Dante's Alfredo!"