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Joke of the Day

"Police men knock on the door..... Somebody knocks on door: Who is there? Police? What do you want? We want to talk. How many of you are there? Two. So talk with each other."

"I only drink to forget that my 4 year old daughter has an iPad Touch and I have to ask for her help when it's my turn to play on it."

"How do you spot the blind man at a nudist beach? Well..it's not hard"

"Just saw one of those giant centipedes run though my living room so now I'm gunna sleep with a flamethrower and a full metal jacket."

"I have a double major in Psychology and Geography. I lead the field in research on glacial depressions."

"Let's pause this conversation until your Transition Lenses catch up."

"I made my first snowman today... It was so white it's already been nominated to Trump's Cabinet."

"Direct quote from my daughter: ""I know horses can play soccer really well because they're fast."" Thank god she's pretty."

"I'm not racist because it's a crime. And crime is for black people."

"Some say money talks Mine just says goodbye"