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Joke of the Day

"As I walked down an alley today, I was accosted by what I thought was an angry, needy turnip. It turned to be a ruder beggar."

"My bro and I are building a bar. My step bro and I want to build a bar in Aushwitz to tap an undiscovered tourism market. We want to call it Gin and Jews."

"Girl are you the legendary Pokemon Mewtwo? Because I've been playing with my balls all day and you're nowhere to be found."

"If your surname is Dumpty, don't name your kid Humpty. I mean, seriously."

"I just wish I was rich enough to be able to throw all of the pots and pans away after I cook."

"Reddit, I need your darkest Christmas jokes to put in my Christmas cards!"

"A jumper cable walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""I'll serve you, but don't start anything."""

"The rest of you just need to get fat because I don't feel like going to the gym anymore..."

"Is the word ""necessarily"" exclusively proceeded by the word ""not""? Not necessarily."

"Remember the 7-Mile Spanking Machine? Turns out there will also be a punch line."