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Joke of the Day

"If guns don't kill people.... If guns don't kill people, people kill people, then toasters don't toast toast. Toast toasts toast."

"Sorry about all the Mario references. I didn't mean to one-up you. I'll pipe down."

"My girlfriend said ""I've got an itch between my toes"". So I asked ""Which toes?"". She answers ""My big toes""."

"What do kazoos and my father have in common? They were both around for a short time in the '90s only to be unheard of from then on."

"Virgin vs. Slut What's the difference between a virgin and a slut? A virgin says ""Don't! STOP!"" A slut says, ""Don't stop!"""

"Did you hear about the terrorist comedian? He bombed on stage."

"Contrary to popular belief, you actually CAN drink lava But only once"

"Why did the Russians lose the space race? Their rocket kept Stalin!"

"What's another word for a penis potato? A dictator"

"I've no idea why I'm a virgin. But I'm guessing it's because my Siamese twin is really ugly."