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Joke of the Day

"Geologists have jokes too Steve: ""Hey, what kind of rocks are these?"" Geologist: ""They're sex stones."" Steve: ""What? Really?"" Geologist: ""Yeah. They're just fucking rocks."""

"What's the difference between a chick pea and a garbanzo bean? I didn't pay 50 bucks to have a garbanzo bean on me."

"I'm married, yet the only person that willingly goes down on their knees in front of my crotch is a 72 year old suit tailor named Pablo."

"The chicken crossed the road. Him: Why did the chicken cross the road ? Her: Because she had heard that the mayor was going to lay a cornerstone and she wanted to see if he could really do it."

"""It's 5 o'clock somewhere."" - a shitty watch."

"What do you call a swashbuckler when he noticed you? A senpairate."

"Forget Klondike, you should see what I'd do for an open bar."

"What's Superman's greatest weakness? Horses"

"Name brands really are better. For instance, I just found out that the Tide pen works much better on stains than regular pens"

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A Likalotapus."