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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a cow that just gave birth? DECALFINATED"
Next Joke
"why did the hipster burn his lips? he drank coffee before it was cool"
"Two muffins are in a oven... the first muffin says, ""damn it's hot in here."", the second one says, ""holy crap a talking muffin!"""
"""Diamonds are forever. But so is herpes."" This is why I never get hired to write advertising campaigns."
"The mall crowd parts as I shuffle through after waking up naked on the food court floor. ""Too pudgy to be a terminator"" says one woman."
"Boy comes home from school, tells his dad he had sex with his teacher The father grins, ""that's my boy. Will you do it again?"" Boy ""yes, as soon as my bottom stops hurting"""
"A person walks into a hospital wearing nothing but plastic wrap around his genitals. The front desk clerk says ""I can clearly see your nuts."""
"Turns out when you're asked who your favourite child is you're expected to pick from your own."
"Why'd the short man take the elevator up? He was feeling down"
"What's got 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog."