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Joke of the Day

"I went to Alcoholics Anonymous last week. The first thing they told me to do was to stop hanging around other alcoholics. So I stopped going."

"Organic chemistry is difficult Those who study it have alkynes of trouble."

"My girlfriend stole my vintage adding machine That calculating bitch."

"I once saw a black man walking down the street carrying a TV And I thought to myself ""Hmm, that one looks a lot like mine!"" Then I remembered, mine was at home, shining my shoes. Silly me."

"*nervously plays with tie* ""I'm sorry. I'm no good during job interviews."" That's ok, just let go of my tie and go on your side of the desk."

"The sincerest form of flattery is having a robot from the future sent back in time to kill you. Imitation is a distant second."

"Hey, I have a good joke about pussy Oh wait... you might not get it..."

"Q: Do you know about the book about copyright infringement? A: It had legal binding."

"I am much less afraid of jail when I'm drunk."

"""Always remember me."" - Anonymous."