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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to thank (you know who) for the (you know what) I'll talk to you later (you know where) and if I don't (you know why)"

"Dear Noah, We could have sworn you said you were leaving at 4:00. Sincerely, The Unicorns"

"So proton calls up electron and says, ""Electron! It's proton, where the hell are you?"" And electron says, ""Um, I don't know. But I can tell you were I probably am!"""

"When a baby is learning to eat shouldn't he have an L-plate?"

"How do you move a 2000 lb dinosaur? Don't know?? Use DINO-MITE"

"What do you call a valet from India? Mahatma Coat"

"What do you call a little person who can talk to ghosts and just escaped from prison? A small medium at large."

"What do you call someone who is obsessed with Joan of Arc? A heroine addict."

"What's with all of these racist jokes on reddit? They're starting to get quite dark"

"Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell she says""DING!"""