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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between two dicks and a joke? I can't take a joke."

"As far as I'm concerned, anyone who suggests I should have a third child is committing a hate crime."

"Cop: i told you this land is off limits Me: oh i thought you said it was all flimits Cop: wtf are flimits Me: idk let's go look Cop: ok"

"Losing your virginity is a lot like learning to ride a bike... Dad is holding you from behind the whole time"

"The Legend of Zelda Joke Do you know why Ganon can't use the internet? There's too many Links."

"If only the workout your thumbs get from scrolling on your phone would go to your abs."

"Just finished a puzzle in only two weeks! I'm pretty proud of myself, because the box said 3-5 years."

"Don't die a virgin Because there are terrorists waiting for you."

"I finally got around to reading that book on watches I got last year It's about time."

"Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake."