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Joke of the Day
"How do you fix the dishwasher? Smack her."
Next Joke
"Some people say ""If you can't beat them, join them"". I say ""If you can't beat them, beat them"", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise."
"eating red meat increases your chances of dying by 13%. i now have a 113% chance of dying."
"What do you get from an invisible cow? Evaporated milk!"
"Don't date a soccer player... There's only a 1/11 chance they're a keeper."
"A mathematician walks into a bar and orders a drink. The punchline has been left as an exercise for the reader."
"They say if you choose a job you love, you'll never work a day in your life. I have to work tomorrow."
"Why are cows always broke? The farmers milk them dry."
"Which band does feminists hate the most? Cis-tem of a Down"
"The men who fought in the Revolutionary War were very brave. They would take turns standing there shooting at each other... ...and that takes balls."