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Joke of the Day

"My favourite sexual move is the JFK I splatter all over her face while she screams and tries to get out of the car"

"Hooker says $500. I say $50. She walks away. Later, I'm walking with my wife, same hooker sees me and says, I see what you got for $50."

"What did the astronaut get on his science project? He received a T minus."

"If I were to ask you out, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one?"

"What did the dog say to the man? Nothing stupid, dogs don't talk."

"Why did simbas father die in lion king? Because he couldn't Mufasa."

"The seven dwarves were sitting in a sauna feeling happy so happy got up and left"

"""I wish there were something like coffee, but faster-acting,"" he thought, before remembering that it already exists and ruins your life."

"What has two legs and red all over? Half a puppy... I'm sorry"

"Noses are red, violets are blue. It ain't love darling, you got flu."