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Joke of the Day

"Pulitzer Prize-winner Lois Lane, I want you to meet your new reporting partner, this mysterious stranger who has never held a job before."

"Prostitution problems are had in Canada because... We use $1 and $2 coins. You can't throw those at strippers. Some of us ignore this problem and use Canadian Tire money."

"I named my hard drive ""dat ass"" So once a month my computer would ask if I want to back dat ass up."

"Really Smooth. I lied told my dad that school was canceled. He said,"" lets go see a movie."" We got in the car and he dropped me off at school."

"Scientists have discovered a drug that can increase a woman's libido 100%. yeah. Its called jewelry."

"What happened to the McDonald's Cook when he stuck his dick in the pickle slicer? They both got fired."

"How many Hilary Clinton supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? None- they prefer to be kept in the dark"

"Next year I'll give up spreadsheets for 40 days and 40 nights... It's going to be Excel Lent"

"What smells worse than an anchovy? An anchovy's cunt"

"What is a priest's favorite guitar chord? Gsus"