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Joke of the Day

"Why does light travel faster than sound? Because some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

"So a turkey and a ham are walking into a cancer survivors meeting... The ham looks over at the turkey and says: ""What are you doing here? You aren't cured. """

"When is a door a container? When it is ajar!"

"Man boobs, man perm, man purse. If you have to identify something by saying the gender, it probably shouldn't exist. Sorry if this is a bad joke I just got bored watching the WNBA."

"Short one... What's red with seven dents in it? Snow White's Cherry"

"Do you ever feel like a tampon? In a good place, but at the wrong time."

"*overeats sugar* *gets diabetes* *gets limbs amputated* *can finally smile authentically in pics now that not worried what to do with hands*"

"I drink to forget that I accidentally once said ""I love you"" when ending a call with a customer service rep."

"why should you never iron a four-leaf clover? Because you shouldn't press your luck."

"As I slowly remove her panties I think to myself God these don't fit me very well"