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Joke of the Day

"According to my neighbor's rooster, it's 5am now. Also according to my neighbor's rooster, we're having fried chicken for dinner tomorrow."

"I was on holiday in Belgium... Apparently it was obvious that I am German, because an elderly man came to me and said ""you lost something "". ""What?"" I asked surprised. ""The war"" he replied."

"Insert penis joke here. Ha."

"How to Feed Elephants by P. Nutts"

"I can tell a police officer is gay by the way he writes me a ticket instead of letting me off with a warning."

"How many pancakes can you fit into a dog house? None because ice cream doesn't have bones."

"Me: Anyone else get the feeling their being watched? ... CIA: They're*"

"What do you call a woman with a purple vagina? Satisfied"

"Doctors seem to have cornered the market on so-called ""medical advice."""

"What do you say if your peeing in Ireland and spot a leprechaun? Urine luck"