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Joke of the Day

"I was on holiday in Belgium... Apparently it was obvious that I am German, because an elderly man came to me and said ""you lost something "". ""What?"" I asked surprised. ""The war"" he replied."

"So my girlfriend told me her dog ate some tampons... I told her to call the vet, maybe they can pull some strings."

"I log in and out of Facebook at the same speed a frightened kid runs down into the basement to grab something and runs back up."

"Why did the Jew prefer to sleep in the dark? Because the lights in his house were contolled by a switch"

"Latest economic indicators show an uptick of growth in the manufacturing outrage sector."

"which part of the centaur carries the centaur babies is it the lady torso or the horse torso and why can't I stop thinking about this"

"How do you circumcise a whale? Send down four skin-divers."

"Pizza Hut is very consistent... The pizza tastes exactly like the box it comes in."

"Want to hear the smartest thing to ever come out of a woman's mouth? (Bar Joke) Einstein's dick"

"How many surrealists does it take to screw in a fish? Lightbulb."