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Joke of the Day

"Teacher: Megan, why are you doing your multiplication on the floor? Megan: You said we had to do it without tables!"

"I will totally judge you based on your choice of breakfast cereal, you unfrosted weirdo."

"Named my iPhone ""Dat Ass""... So now iTunes tells me it's backing ""Dat Ass"" up"

"What's so good about having sex with twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them."

"Did you guys hear about the new metal band playing at the winery this evening? They're called Grapes of Wrath."

"Jokes What is Mario's favorite fruit"

"Every cab driver I've ever had seems like he killed thousands of people in his homeland."

"What was Hitler's favourite song? Knocking on ovens door"

"""It's a bird!"" [Superman zooms down to inches away from the screaming guy's face] S: Birds can't go that fast Sean. What are you an idiot"

"Ass. You've got a donkey. I've got a rooster. Your donkey bites one of the legs off of my rooster. What's the end result? One foot of my cock up your ass."