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Joke of the Day

"My 3yo said Cheese is her favorite place. I don't know if I should be worried that she thinks cheese is a place or sad because it's not."

"Have you seen the features on the next-gen iPhone? Just google 'Galaxy S4 reviews'."

"How many different animals did we have to jump on the backs of before we discovered horses were cool with it?"

"Why won't you ever see an ant walk in a church? They're insects. I'll show myself out."

"What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing... they're both stuck up bitches."

"I was in a gang once we used to carry pocket knives & wear all green with blood-red bandanas around our neck. Wait, that was Boy Scouts."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Black lives matter."

"I used to be a cross dressing fireman... ...I kept getting a ladder in my tights."

"Dad, quick, call me an ambulance! ""Okay, ambulance."" ^^^^^^sorry"

"I like my Wifi like I like my sex... Unprotected."