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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a box of dead babys and a Lamborghini The Lamborghini isn't in my garage covered in a tarp"

"Got my hair done again. I'm so blonde now I can barely spell my last name."

"What did Michael Jackson say to the Vegetables? Just beet it"

"I bought a gun from Chekhov... I figure I'll have to use it at some point."

"You know what the difference between an SUV and a rental car is? You can take a rental car *anywhere*."

"What's Alderaan's main export? Dead bodies."

"There's nothing I've learned from being a father that I couldn't just as easily have figured out from setting all my money on fire."

"Why doesn't Thor of the insect world use a hammer? He's already got a Thor Axe."

"How many German does it take to take down a plane? One. Because he's very efficient and silent while doing it."

"Jews don't recognise Jesus Protestants don't recognise the Pope Baptists don't recognise each other at the liquor store"