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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a burlap sack and my nutsack? The babies in my nutsack are still living."

"Ever hear about the baby born with no eye lids? they used the skin from his circumcision to make some so now he is cock eyed"

"Why was the actor detained by airport security? He said he was in town to shoot a pilot."

"According to Facebook, Sept. 11th is about posting as many pictures of crying bald eagles obscured by an American flag as you can."

"What type of car does a ghost drive? A BOOick."

"Why don't blind people go for bungee jumping? it scares the shit out of the dogs."

"ELI5 What happens when a high school calls in a replacement teacher for a subject they know nothing about? Ooops... wrong sub."

"""Choas Theory""-themed restaurant: Eating Disorder"

"""Yep, I'm going to jail."" When a State Trooper takes the same exit off the highway*"

"wife: dont say anythin stupid on the way out me: i wont [shakes priest's hand after lovely wedding ceremony] me: so are you god's boyfriend?"