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Joke of the Day

"What did the left tit say to the right tit? If we don't get some support soon, people are going to think we're nuts!"

"Where's the best place to find a dog with no legs? Where you left it"

"""The most comfortable place to put your elbows at dinner is on the table, so I'm gonna go ahead and make that bad manners."" -Some asshole"

"A condom and a coffin. Both are designed for stiffs. The difference is one is for coming and the other for going"

"So, a cannibal walks down the street.... ..... with a handburger."

"Battlefield calls 911 Battlefield: Hi I'd like to turn myself in for a murder 911: Who's the victim? Battlefield: Call of Duty"

"My best friend was talking to me about proposing to his girlfriend. I'm not sure though, she's not really my type."

"What would Michael Jackson be doing if he were alive right now? Kids."

"Just crushed my son in an epic game of Monopoly. His tears flooded Baltic Avenue."

"Why did the black man walk into a bar? Because the cell door was still locked."