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Joke of the Day

"Where does the Federal Reserve hide all of its dirty profits? In debasement."

"I like my women like I like my coffee... ...ground up and in the freezer."

"How do you get 100 babies into a bowl? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips"

"I only got one match, but I can make an explosion. And now the government thinks I'm a terrorist."

"Definition: Politics Poli (Poly): Many.... Tic(k)s: Blood sucking creatures"

"Why does Popeye have such huge forearms? Olive Oil is a virgin"

"We saw, we came... ...and we were told to get out of the girls' locker room."

"I bought my son a pet snake and the salesman said ""Be careful those snakes grow up to 20 feet"" I said ""Shut up...snakes don't grow feet!!!!"""

"I'm not a womanizer! They were all women when I found them!"

"When Hugh Hefner dies I don't think people will say he's in a better place."