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Joke of the Day

"My biggest fear is dying alone. Not really stoked to die with people either. You know, dying in general doesn't exactly sound like pancakes."

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"What is a pirate's favorite kind of explosive? A M-80."
"What number is higher than infinity? 420"
"What's the difference between driving a Volvo and putting your hand down the front of Donald Trumps trousers? You feel a bigger dick driving a Volvo"
"How did Camelot get its name? Guinevere liked to hump a lot."
"A guy walks into a bar... ""Ouch"""
"There once was a mouse called Keith Who did circumcisions for free with his teeth; He didn't do it for pleasure, Excitement or leisure... He did it for the cheese underneath."
"Women are like Gremlins, get them wet and they get into all sorts of trouble."
"April Fools Day is ONLY for singles. The married have their anniversary ."
"This is a frightening statistic 25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness! That's scary! It means 75% are running around untreated!"