175219
Joke of the Day
"You know what I hate about abortion clinics.. They really suck the life out of you."
Next Joke
"What's the difference between a wheat thin and a lesbian? One's a snack cracker and the other is a crack snacker."
"People say Money talks... But all mine says is Goodbye."
"I've never been offered money for sex. Never been offered money to not have sex either. So there's that."
"How do you know if someone is a vegan? They'll fucking tell you..."
"If the light turns green & the guy behind you honks cause he thinks you're taking too long to go get out & start checking your tire pressure"
"9/11 knock knock *Knock Knock.* Who's there? *9/11* 9/11 who? *You said you'd never forget.*"
"Maybe there is no baby I'm starting to suspect my wife's been stuffing her shirt with an increasingly large series of hams Now I'm hungry."
"There's something I should tell you... ""Oh god what is it"" I have crabs ""NOOO"" *holds up two crabs* ""Oh I thought you meant-"" And HIV ""NOOO"""
"Just used my CVS receipt to build a really cool fort for the kids."