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Joke of the Day

"Why did god give Marines one more IQ point than he gave to horses. So they won't shit during parades."

"Heard this the other day. Made me piss myself even though im not American There's nothing worse than a 6.9 A 69 interrupted by a period."

"Do you know what the best part about banging 21 year olds is? There's 21 of them."

"I had a dream that a priest took a dump on my front lawn holy shit"

"[tearing off our clothes] Her: I want you. Take off your shoes. *kicks flip-flop through her TV*"

"Why Donald Trump might win the election but resign on the first day? He finds out he has to move in to a small house in a black neighborhood!"

"Where do Martians drink beer ? At a mars bar !"

"Skinny Girl... What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."

"What do you call a math teacher who's really into BDSM? A denominatrix."

"Yet another Clinton picks heads Over tail."