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Joke of the Day

"What does MC Hammer and antimatter have in common? Can't touch this!"

"Good friends help you move. Great friends help you move bodies."

"Egypt needs a new president. I need a summer job. This could be perfect."

"What is a nickname for any black man? Tripod, because they have an extra leg.."

"""I decided I wanted to be a ninja so I googled ""Ninja School"", followed the link and the page could not be found. Well played, Ninja School"""

"I think the blue states should get the taco trucks first, and the red states have to wait, because elections have consequences."

"Greatest Photocopy Machine 9Gag"

"Secret to success is to know who to blame for your failures."

"Dude: You got a light? Me: Sure. *hand him a flashlight* Dude: I mean for my cigarette. Me: Yeah, he can use it."

"Sometimes I wish you could ask the pharmacist to ""make it a double""."