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Joke of the Day
"Why are ghosts always dehydrated? They have a lot of boos but no water"
Next Joke
"I text-ed my girlfriend ""goodnight, love you"" but accidentally sent it to my boss. Now Its awkward, cause he holds my hand during meetings."
"[ouija board] me: are there any spirits with us? Speak now ouija board: H E L L O F R O M T H E O T H E R S I D E me: ....please stop"
"There is nothing louder than a party across the street that you weren't invited to."
"CIVIL WAR SPOILER: A lot of people in the South still don't know they lost."
"a boss is like a diaper always on your ass and edventually full of shit"
"""When I call your name say 'omnipresent.'"" - teacher to class full of Gods"
"The janitor's union called for sweeping reforms."
"Every time I use <3 in an @ to someone, I can't help but think, ""Please accept this carrot with balls as a token of how much I heart you."""
"Anyone looking for a job should consider becoming an elephant circumsiser... ... the pay isn't too great, but the tips are enormous!"