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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear that the Jim Henson company is making a show about meth-cooking? They're calling it Borking Bad."

"Kentucky Fried Chicken has introduced the new Hillary Bucket. Two large thighs, two small breasts and two left wings."

"Nice try Jehovah's witnesses, but dressing up like the police and saying you have a warrant isn't going to get me to come to the door."

"How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders in the glove box."

"How many bears could Bear Grylls grill if Bear Grylls could grill bears? Seven."

"How do you get to the top of a weather beacon? Climate"

"Wife just shouted to me to get my big chopper out .After the panic subsided, I realised she meant we were out of firewood for the stove."

"What do you call a flea on the moon? A lunartick."

"What does the Dalai Lama order from the pizza shop? One with everything"

"Light a fire for a man, he'll be warm for the night. Light a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life."