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Joke of the Day

"After watching how stressful it was for Clark Kent's dad, I don't know if I could adopt a kid from a blown-up planet."

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"Police officer: Ma'am do you know why I pulled you over? Me: I'm just as confused as you are."
"Redheaded guys know they can just dye their hair, right? They don't have to live like that."
"Stephen Hawking's favourite videogame? Flappy birds"
"Losing a wife can be hard. In most cases it is damned near impossible."
"How come Smokey the Bear doesn't have any children? Every time his wife gets hot he beats her with a shovel."
"What's your best Hitler joke?"
"What's it like living with Permanent Erection Disorder? Some days are harder than others."
"Sprayed a spider with some Davidoff Cool Water & it didn't die. Now I'm just stuck with a spider that I wanna bang."