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Joke of the Day

"Why do onions have poor self-image? Because people cry when they get onions naked."

"What is a difference between Jesus and a Picture of Jesus? It takes one nail to hang a picture."

"It's not a nap if you never got out of bed."

"Two dogs are standing beside a road... The first one goes, ""woof"", the second says, ""knock it off! That's all you said yesterday."""

"Do all black people have a problem with slavery? Or just mine?"

"Two men walk into a bar. First one says ""I'll have an H20."" Second man says, ""You know what? I'll have an H20 too."" The second man dies."

"Two fish are in a tank... One is driving, and the other is manning the guns."

"Bruce Willis is being chased by a pug. he jumps in a taxi and escapes. he breathes a sigh of relief. the driver turns around. it's the pug"

"I just realized I'm a bisexual. Every time I have sex, I have to buy it."

"Hey Alaska wilderness show person who is about to freeze to death with no hope in sight, maybe just cuddle up with the crew filming you..."