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Joke of the Day

"""Daddy, did you know Pluto was recently reclassified as a dwarf planet, or plutoid?"" ""Sweetie, I'm pretty sure he's a dog."""

"-Trump's top agenda for his first 100 days in office : make everyone use ""bigly"" in conversations so he doesn't look like a fool for being the only one who uses this word ."

"""Dave just showed up"" Dave the fireman or Dave who always uses inappropriate abbreviations? *Dave barges in* HEY GUYS I'M DTF ""Yeah I dunno"""

"Beauty is only skin deep but that's ok because my eyes can't see any farther than that."

"Grandma is it exciting being 99? It certainly is! If I wasn't 99 I'd be dead."

"What kind of pants did the Japanese porn star wear to her job interview? Bu-khakis"

"A lion walks into a bar. Several people get up and leave predicting the impending danger at hand."

"Signs And Notices"

"Why did the introvert polish his shoes regularly? So he could look at others' faces."

"LPT: When cooking chicken, it needs a lot of support Alone, it tastes absolutely fowl."