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Joke of the Day

"Two clean jokes that start dirty. What's brown and sticky? A STICK! What's a foot long and slippery? A SLIPPER!"

"Never ask white Americans what their ethnicity is unless you wanna hear a list of every European country and meaningless fractions."

"I guess you could call her a trophy wife. She's tattooed with the names of the previous winners."

"Scientists have identified the dog particle. It is a good particle. Such a good particle yes it is. Does it want a treatsy weatsy yes it doe"

"[funeral] *walks up to give eulogy* *pulls notes out of pocket* ""Frank was a weirdo that bit his toenails."" *folds notes* *sits back down*"

"My pizza store delivers weed as well. Lol just kidding. He doesn't sell pizza."

"My sense of humor is so dark... ... one of these days it's going to get shot by the police."

"Why did Bob get fired from his job at the dildo factory? Because he got caught sitting on the job."

"What's the difference between an Iraqi school and an Iraqi Army base? One poses a significant potential threat to ISIS and its continued existence. The other is an Iraqi Army base."

"Food on the Table by E. Tittup"