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Joke of the Day

"Oklahoma Thunder & Miami Heat... Can't tell if they are talking about a weather report or NBA Finals."

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"what is an pirates fav element potassium because pirate doesnt want scurvy. it not argon k?"
"If you're American when you go into the toilet, and Asian when you come out, what are you on the toilet? European!"
"What does 80 year old pussy taste like? Depends"
"What does King Kong and a black person have in common? neither of them can't speak english and are unemployed."
"My neighbor knocked on my door at 2am last night. 2 am! Can you believe it? How rude. Luckily I was already awake playing my drums."
"Who invented the round table? Sir Cumference"
"Girls can be so ungrateful. I make her breakfast in bed and instead of saying ""Thank you"" she is all like ""How did you get into my house?"""
"My 12yo son's protip: Buy larger sized clothes and you'll look like you lost weight. You're welcome."
"I swear to god dude, if you say ""But what if we get arrested?"" One more time you're out of the group."