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Joke of the Day

"Dyslexia The difference between baking ricin vs. rice pudding for your friends and family this holiday season."

"What did the jack say to the car? ""Can I give you a lift?"""

"How do you tittie fuck a flat chested chick? Froggy style. Ribbit ribbit"

"What's being in love feel like? You know when someone cancels plans you wanted to cancel anyway? Almost as good as that."

"I hate it when they tell you that they accept cards but refuse to accept my seven of spades"

"I make spelling mistakes alot and when I say alot I mean a lot."

"NURSE: The other nurses and I bought you this box of chocolates for Valentines Day! DR DOG: You're joking, right?"

"Vincent van Gogh called... He wants his ear back... so that he can hear you on the telephone."

"I went to a zoo but the only animal it had was one dog It was a shih tzu"

"Airline just told my GF she has too much baggage & they've only known her a couple of minutes."